In anyone's lifetime, regardless of who we are or what we look like, I think I could say wit confidence that each of us have had some experience with bullying. Hopefully none of you reading this have been on the giving end of the stick but if you had then I hope by now you would have learned how wrong it is and changed to being a better person.
That being said, October is Bullying Prevention Month.
The lovely people at The Elephant Pants have invited us to share an insecurity we have. If you've been bullied, you'd know that usually it's because of something we can't change. Something that's obvious that we probably never even thought was a problem (and it really isn't) but there would be people who made us think otherwise.
So for this exercise, let's acknowledge the Elephant In The Room. Maybe this is something we were bullied about, maybe just something we are uncomfortable talking about. As hard as it can be to bring up certain topics, I found this to be a wonderful exercise and I'm more than ready to share my insecurity.
Even though Singapore's a very multi-cultural country, it's tough when asian culture still dictates that lighter skin is always more beautiful and parents tell their children that from such a young age. I was only about 7 and they would repeat it to me in school. I never heard it from my own parents but hearing it from 30 other kids sure makes you feel ugly and that kind of thing stick with you longer than you ever want it to.
Frankly I was worried about my complexion for almost 10 years after. Wishing I could change it every now and then when I never should have that thought to start with. It's a little funny because today I couldn't be more proud of my skin colour and a big part of that is seeing girls with complexions similar to mine who are absolutely beautiful, confident and doing amazing things. Representation is so important and I do wish I had this when I was younger so I didn't feel so insecure about it.
Maybe I got a little lucky growing up in some ways. When all my peers and even my sister were struggling with acne and all those annoying pimples, I had nothing but clear skin. I didn't think it was necessary for me to have it but I was happy when I noticed i was 15,16,17 and still never had a breakout. I never had to worry about it or learn how to take care of my skin so it made things a little easier for me. Until now.
I'm 21 years old and for the first time in my life my skin is breaking out. Funny, isn't it?
Turns out my skin was extremely dry growing up, i remember every facial person telling me that and going "do this" "do that" but I would never listen. No pimples are a good thing even if it's cause you have dry skin right? Yeah, not how it works.
So now that I'm actually taking care of myself, now that my skin's in a better condition, it's doing what I figure it would have maybe 5 years ago. This last 2 weeks has been hell week on my face and I definitely feel insecure about it. My mother thinks it's the haze here in Singapore that's been ruining my skin like it has been my health (I've been sick twice since the haze started and I have a constant sore throat :( go away already will you!).
When you spend so long not giving it a second though and suddenly you have not like 1 or 2 but like 20 popping out at the same time it feels like it's time to take cover and stay hidden until they all go away.
It's hard, and I hate to admit it but it's embarrassing to feel this way. Not because I fear what others may think but because of how I can carry myself with confidence and something like this has taken me back 10 steps.
But I guess at least now I'm learning new thing about my skin. I know anything that isn't natural make my skin irritated and break out even more, natural products work best especially coffee scrubs and Clear Me Skin Face Mask - my face loves that!
So trial and error for a little bit and let hope by the time I turn 25 at least this goes away for good and I just need to deal with the occasional one or two intruders.
I don't remember what It was like to not have eczema. It's not as bad as some cases but I definitely don't like it. I have never really talked about this to anyone besides family and the occasional doctor. I have eczema and it affects the sole of my feet. The skin gets really dry and irritated in hot and humid weather - when I lived in Perth, during winter it was 1000 times better! - If i get on hot sand or concrete you'll believe my feet will be irritated for days after!
It's better today than it was 10 years ago but I don't love it. I'd want to make it go away and every cream I got for it just make my skin feel like it was gonna peel off - maybe it's the whole not natural products problem.
I'd say at least it's not as obvious as it could be, but that does't mean it makes me feel weird about it. I didn't want to wear sandals for ages because I felt like everyone could see how ugly my feet were. I don't know if anyone would have even seen anything since your soles are always touching the ground but I thought they were ugly so I had to hide them.
Maybe it's got more to do with how I've accepted it than how it really is because when I decided to stop worrying it seemed like it wasn't as scary anymore and it was much more manageable. I got scrubs that actually helped make it better and some moisturisers that do the trick better than any doctors creams I've received.
But again, It's not something i'm 100% comfortable with. And that's okay. We all have our insecurities, and these are 3 of mine. We grow and learn and we decide how to deal with these issues. And I'm deciding that they're not as big a deal as I thought they were
If you feel up to it, get on Instagram and share your insecurity with us. Tag @TheElephantPants and #ElephantInTheRoom so everyone can read it! (If you're comfortable with that!) It would also be great if any of you would look through the hashtag and provide support in everyone else's posts!
And just for some more support and love, the co-hosts from the seasonal yoga challenges i host, Amy (left) Dorotea (right) and Helen (bottom) have shared their insecurities as well!
You can read more about theirs on their Instagram pages (@NaughtyYogaGirl , @DoroteasWorld and @Aleksic_Twins) respectively.
If you're about to share, don't be scared to tag us too!
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